Friday, December 5, 2008

"Non-Reader" Conversion Story


A mission companion once told me that listening to a book on tape/CD does not count as having "read" the book. I beg to differ - being very high on the auditory learner end of the spectrum. I tend to think I can absorb the same amount of knowledge as one who "read" the book with her eyes. After much debate (what else is there to do at night in your mission apartment???) we still differed on this subject - so when President Hinckley asked all members to "Read the Book of Mormon," I wondered what HE would think of those of us who listened to it????
Over three years ago, I came in contact with an educational paradigm - Thomas Jefferson Education - and it drastically changed my life.
I was invited to a youth camp (Youth For America, held annually) to observe. I arrived just before the adolescents did, and found a seat in the welcome room. I watched as each of them arrived at their camp orientation. Youth came from various states and Canada, some meeting each other for the first time, others were return participants. I marveled at their maturity in interacting one with another - introducing themselves, being assertive, seemingly quite secure, not the "typical" teenage scene (generally highly regarded as a time of insecurity). As the youth were seated and the orientation began, the speaker asked, "Who knows who Montesque is?" I was lost - the first question of the day, and I was lost! I was thinking, "Wait, Montegue (?) is Romeo and Juliet - not that I 've ever read it, or seen it, but I think that's the name. But that's not what this guy said???"
There was a low mumbling of answers, like in Sunday school when the teacher asks something as common as, "How can we communicate with Heavenly Father?" I heard the boy next to me say, "We know, he wrote the Spirit of the Laws."
"Okay, wait - What planet are these people from?" I thought. This was in 2005 - I had not just crawled out of a hole, or so I thought. I'd graduated from college, and graduate school - I thought I had earned an education. I had been married 3 years, I just had my 2nd child, but I had NO IDEA what these "teens" were discussing - and it went downhill from there.
What they were discussing, I later discovered, was a great philospher whose ideas were well known by our country's founding fathers and upon which a great degree of our country's constitution is founded.
But at the time, I had NO IDEA. What I did have in that moment, was, in psychological terms, an "existential crisis." That is what happens when everything you are, everything you know to be true, is suddenly challenged, or seemingly shattered in an instant, and you're left to figure out up from down, truth from error, and where you fit in all of the broken pieces.
My "shattering" was this: All my life I thought that "getting an education" meant going to school. And that going to college (and doing well) and then graduate school, was considered a "good education" especially for a girl my age. As I sat with these youth, however, who, throughout the day discussed subjects way over my head and articulated their "missions in life" and how they were making a "difference in the world," I began to shrink, wondering, "What did I learn in the past 18 years of school???" I felt like a preschooler among scholars.
I had a do or die moment. I could either choose to crawl into a hole and die of shame, or, enroll in a fresh pursuit of obtaining an "education."
Thus, in 2005 I entered the "preschool" of Thomas Jefferson Education (which is the modality from which these particular youth had emerged).
The first incorrect assumption I had to rid myself of was the long held belief that I could learn without reading. Having acquired that belief in elementary school, and having proven throughout ALL of my schooling years that I could "succeed" (meaning get top grades in classes I chose to succeed in) without cracking a book or dusting my feet at a library door, I had to buckle down and start at the beginning. A real education, I came to believe, comes from the study of classics - in every subject - classics can only be studied by reading them (or, listening to them, perhaps :) They cannot be transmitted through textbook summaries. I swallowed my pride and officially (I did announce it to the world) converted from a proud, "non-reader" to a "reader."
My first book was Les Miserables - the unabridged version. Loved it! It has taken me years, but I'm still trying, daily, to make myself create the time and space to read.
All of this history, was simply to announce that I had a great day today. The cosmos must have been aligned because I had time to leisurely read and I looked at the stack of books that I'm currently purusing, and I wanted to share my current picks:
Power Birth (Lydi Ronka Owen) - absolutely life changing - the BEST birthing book ever - short, simple, empowering.
The Infinite Power of Hope - Elder Uchtdorf's Oct. conference message. Holy Moly - I have to take it a word at a time b/c he's so darn right on!
What Your first Grader Needs to Know (E.D. Hirsch Jr.) - an educational alternative to "typical" curriculum
Strengthening Marriage - LDS Family Services - a new manual for the church's marriage and family class.
The Relationship Cure - John M. Gottman
and Out of our Minds: Learning to be Creative (Ken Robinson - who I posted earlier on a youtube link).
My goal in this coming week is to share the "ah-hahs" from these picks. I'm just so proud of myself for being a "reader." It's like I've joined a new club or passed some kind of milestone in life, a "coming of age" experience, like getting your first bra. It's like now I'm "one of the girls."
My next problem is finding people to discuss these things with - I'm still an auditory learner, but I guess I read kind of quirky stuff, b/c there's not a whole lot of book clubs out there touting these titles.
However, because I am anti-mass hystery as well, I don't think I'll ever find the right book club for me. I refused to see the movie Titanic (haven't to this day) b/c of the craze. It was so peculiar to be "out of the loop" and observe the hysteria as my girlfriends would talk about it and dreamingly pant over Leonardo. Thus, I also refuse to read Twilight (Can I even spell it?).
Just give me some Gottman and leave me alone. Real life is so much more dramatic than fiction - why go anywhere else?

4 comments:

Marcee said...

I am with you on some points. I am not a great reader. I get bored and quicly forget what I have read. I think books on cd is just fine. I also don't take much time to sit down and read. I should. I too have not been in the twilight craze! Not into it. The books you ahve chosen sound very intriging. Good luck... I have read some of the marriage one and like it...

Michellie-mom said...

I meant to post a comment a while back on the sir ken video...loved it. Ties in nicely with ANOTHER great talk by Elder Uchtdorf this conference from the Women's Conference (he really hit them out of the ballpark this year). An excerpt... "The desire to create is one of the deepest yearnings of the human soul. No matter our talents, education, backgrounds, or abilities, we each have an inherent wish to create something that did not exist before. Creation brings deep satisfaction and fulfillment. We develop ourselves and others when we take unorganized matter into our hands and mold it into something of beauty." Speaking of the Sir Ken, I'm guessing you must have just purchased the book...I went to the downtown library about a month ago to check it out and they didn't have it! 4 stories of books and no Sir Ken. :( We are rediscovering the library in my house...they do such great things there...they have a bouncing babies class once a week (and other classes as the child grows), movie rentals, piano music, c.d.s, you name it. I have fond memories of walking to the library when I was a kid and picking out books. I can still remember that smell of books on the shelf...the way they smell at a library. Anyway, this is turning into an epistle...it was good to see you for 2 seconds, next time we'll have to make it 4. :)

Quincy said...

TJed has changed my life as well. I have really enjoyed reading your thoughts. I am intrigued with each one of your posts to realize that I am not alone! I hope someday to talk more with you about the journey. (We just had our first homebirth this past February, it was incredible!) I was just finishing at BYUH when your husband became then called ASBYU President. I married my Polynesian guy in 98 and we now have 4 kids.) Your ideas about intention and attraction are so powerful, I too and discovering this power. I've thought for months about posting a comment because it's just inevitable that our paths should cross --similar vibration I think! I'd love an email sometime! I don't think we ever met while at byu. magalei at molalla dot net.

Anonymous said...

Well, well, well. I'm so glad you're finally turning into a reader!! You know that I love to read and this year I set a goal to read 50 books. For me it's been awesome and I think I'll keep it for next year as well. I totally think listening to a book on CD counts. You're still investing time and thought just as you would if you were actually flipping the pages yourself. I read Les Miserables back in high school and loved it so I'm glad you did as well. And you're not missing anything by not reading the Twilight series.